25.12.09

My favourite Christmas Carol


The origin of the Christmas carol we know as Silent Night was a poem that was written in 1816 by an Austrian priest called Joseph Mohr. On Christmas Eve in 1818 in the small alpine village called Oberndorf it is reputed that the organ at St. Nicholas Church had broken. Joseph Mohr gave the poem of Silent Night (Stille Nacht) to his friend Franz Xavier Gruber and the melody for Silent Night was composed with this in mind. The music to Silent Night was therefore intended for a guitar and the simple score was finished in time for Midnight Mass. Silent Night is the most famous Christmas carol of all time!

Lyrics:

Silent night, holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace

Silent night, holy night!
Shepherds quake at the sight
Glories stream from heaven afar
Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia!
Christ, the Saviour is born
Christ, the Saviour is born

Silent night, holy night
Son of God, love's pure light
Radiant beams from Thy holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace
Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth
Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth

It's so lovely to be listening to Christmas carols, bake cookies and Christmas cakes and do all Christmassy things! This is a lovely cake recipe. Please follow the links:

Recipe:http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/database/chocolatefruitcake_84675.shtml

Video:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TC_tA8sdFo

This looks like the yummiest Christmas cake ever. (Though I haven't tried it myself yet! )

WISH YOU ALL A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!

17.12.09

Respite

Sometimes
             the blueness of sky is
             not enough reprieve,
             the lapping of waves is
             no sufficient relief.

And
             a steaming pot of tea is
             too hot for the mouth,
             a piping mug of espresso
             too bitter for the tongue.

11.12.09

May the poem never end

Will the Poem End?
-Dilip Chitre

Will the poem end where
Barbed letters stare their black spells
Aimed at my eyes
Blood turns into tears shed by
An absent eye
And the admonition:
"Thou shalt not love this world
And sleep with thy enemy."


Will the poem end when
All his light is spent
And to a standstill, to a standstill come
All heartbeats and all drums
The cosmic drone
Buzzes back into life
Looking for its beginning.

Veteran poet, filmmaker, musician and artist Dilip Chitre passes away. He was suffering from cancer for the past few years.
His contribution to post independent Indian literature has been immense. His translations of Tukaram's work into English have been a celebration of the saint and Indian literature alike.
He is well known for his films, Vijeta and Ardha Satya with Govind Nihalani.
He has written numerous poems, Marathi and English and is the author of a good many anthologies.
There have been numerous exhibitions of his paintings.
He was a rare individual whose presence and creations touched so many facets of the world and its people. His contribution to the arts is all encompassing and can never be forgotten.
We'll miss him.
May the poem never end.

7.12.09

Mark Anthony's speech from Julius Caesar

William Shakespeare


Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him;
The evil that men do lives after them,
The good is oft interred with their bones,
So let it be with Caesar ... The noble Brutus
Hath told you Caesar was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Caesar answered it ...
Here, under leave of Brutus and the rest,
(For Brutus is an honourable man;
So are they all; all honourable men)
Come I to speak in Caesar's funeral ...
He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man….
He hath brought many captives home to Rome,
Whose ransoms did the general coffers fill:
Did this in Caesar seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, Caesar hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
You all did see that on the Lupercal
I thrice presented him a kingly crown,
Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And, sure, he is an honourable man.
I speak not to disprove what Brutus spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then to mourn for him?
O judgement! thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason…. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar,
And I must pause till it come back to me.




This speech is perhaps the most famous, most loved and most powerful speech in the history of English literature. The use of sarcasm (around the word 'honourable' and 'ambitious') is evident and so is the point that Anthony is trying to make here. He feels for Caesar in a heart wrenching way ('My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar') but uses it with poignancy to convince and remind people the truth about Caesar's actions and character as opposed to whatever Brutus has accused him of. Commendable and great. 

4.12.09

TO AN ISLE IN THE WATER

by: William Butler Yeats (1865-1939)

SHY one, shy one,
Shy one of my heart,
She moves in the firelight
Pensively apart.

She carries in the dishes,
And lays them in a row.
To an isle in the water
With her would I go.

She carries in the candles,
And lights the curtained room,
Shy in the doorway
And shy in the gloom;

And shy as a rabbit,
Helpful and shy.
To an isle in the water
With her would I fly.

Source: http://www.poetry-archive.com

28.11.09

A Walk

by Rainer Maria Rilke



My eyes already touch the sunny hill.
going far ahead of the road I have begun.
So we are grasped by what we cannot grasp;
it has inner light, even from a distance-

and charges us, even if we do not reach it,
into something else, which, hardly sensing it,
we already are; a gesture waves us on
answering our own wave...
but what we feel is the wind in our faces.

Translated by Robert Bly
Source: http://www.poemhunter.com

19.11.09

Un-socially

Because there are over a million rules in the social bible!

It is supposedly an independent life, though all rules have been set. Others have decided what code of conduct will or won’t be correct. All one has to do is do or say something and look around. If faces are passive, she has done the right thing. If there’s even the hint of a frown, it’s best to undo the last action. Who knows whom one might end up displeasing?

There are rules, lots of rules. There are rules because we live in a society. A broken rule gives people the right to ‘point a finger’ at the rule-breaker and her clan.

There are rules about a million things – which school to study, which subject to study, whom to be friends with, how much to talk, which books to read, what occupation to aspire for, how much to score in the test, the necessity to score more than the neighbour, which shop to shop, which barber to get a haircut from, which clubs to be a member of, which sport to enjoy, which astrologer to get the kundali made etcetera.. [sigh].

In small towns, everyone knows everyone – each family knows each family up to three generations (at least), and they are always worried about all the families they know – up to the next three generations (at least). For example, Mr X’s daughter laughing (too loud social decibel meter-wise) on the street might give a dozen not-so-tolerant-urging-to-strengthen-sanskars advices to Mrs and Mr X. Mr Y’s son caught being greeted by his co-ed classmate will cause quite some head-shaking-mournful-beta haath se nikal gaya condolences being offered for the Y family (indirectly because it was a boy and boys can only make mistakes whereas girls commit sins).

And, the commendable part is, there’s no printed edition of the ‘social bible’ available anywhere; not on flipkart or amazon or google-books and definitely not in the local pichhli gulli waali kitabon ki dukaan. How all these families, their children and their children and their children know all these rules by heart is infinitely puzzling. Let’s consider this - new rules are made every day (to keep up with the modern world), some old ones fine tuned conveniently and still some being sometimes discarded (oh yes, convenience has more power than we ever admit). (Come to think of it, just like bible, there are versions like Luke, Matthew, John and editions like Old Testament, New Testament.) Then how does everyone else know when someone (like a poor Jr. X or Jr. Y) breaks a rule? Could it be in the air, water soil; or the fruits, grain and vegetable? Probably it’s in the genes – the middle class DNA. The kids are born knowing all the rules and versions (and all) like Abhimanyu.

What if, like so many genetic disorders and congenital defects, someone, anyone does NOT receive the pre-birth knowledge of the social bible genetically? How many rules could be taught to such a kid ; and how many versions (or editions whatever!)? What if she laughs and he slaps his co-ed classmate on her back on the streets? What if these kids make friends outside the ‘allowed’ group, enjoy sports others don’t know about and play hop-scotch in the neighbourhood gully and their rules? O my God, what a terrible, scary ‘What if’ this would be!

The ‘What if’ generation has started to arrive. There are lots of social bibles in dust bins these days (metaphorically of course, because the rules have been thrown out through actions, decisions and ways of life).

They’ve learnt that it’s easiest to live when you live your life from outside your window: no preferences, no choices, no exercising your will – always refer to the ‘rules’. That’s the ideal way to live. In fact, not even that, because we are a ‘progressive, educated, broad-minded, yet well grounded to our reality’ people. So they also know that the society pretends to give choices, in terms of choosing an education, friends, career, house and spouse. So ideally, one must pretend to have preferences, choices and will, and simultaneously make sure that they are exactly the ones laid down by everyone else. That is the IDEAL way to live.

They’ve also learnt that rebellion is such a waste of energy. So if they don’t live from outside their lives’ windows, then they place themselves and their lives in a cage and live, pretending to be around other people.

So they do not rebel, they do not convince anyone or show them their points of view, they do not argue – they pretend.

8.11.09

Can love be just agreeable?

good love bad love
          young love worried love
                    loud love weak love
                              quick love stale love
                                        fresh love creepy love
                                                  damp love cuddly love...

Convenient love?
           Disgraceful love?
                       Egoistic love?
                                 Easy love?
                                           Served-on-a-platter love?
                                                     Laws-of-economics abiding love?            
love?
          good love bad love
                    ..........
                             ..........                                      
        

6.11.09

Poetry across space and time: I (Zhuang Zhi)

Certain things remain same across eras and civilizations. Beauty, pain, loss and happiness have the same colours all over the world. Poetry too, for that matter.

Different poets have written in different times, in different geographical locations using varied poetic forms and genres. However in spite of the seeming differences and variety, on delving a little deeper, we discover that some central ideas and primitive/ ancient human concepts have had a considerable impact on poetry - across centuries and geographies.

1. Day's Night, Night's Day
-A.K.Ramanujan

     In ancient China, a clever
man, a Buddhivanta, dreamt each night
     he was an orange
butterfly;

     half fluttering, half flying.
His night slid into day,
     from waking to dreaming
his day into flying night.

     Is he night’s butterfly
dreaming he is a man
     or is he day’s man dreaming
he is night’s butterfly?

     Meta-
morphosed,
     diurnally,
he lost his mind.

The final sentence of this poem is Ramanujan's own addition to a story he has taken from classic Daoism (which later became Zen Buddhism). In the story a man dreams he is a butterfly and on waking wonders if he is a man or a butterfly dreaming about being a man.

Source: 'Poems and a Novella' by A.K.Ramanujan, Oxford University Press (ISBN: 019567498-7)
 
2. Monk Sogi
( This is a Japanese Renga poem based on the thoughts of Zhuang Zhi which is also the basis of the above poem. )

Hito wo yume to ya
omoishiruramu;
sumi suteshi,
sono wa kochou no
yadori nite

Translation of Steven D. Carter:

That man's life is but a dream -
is what we now come to know.

Its house abandoned,
the garden has become home
   to butterflies.

omoishiru is a compound verb from omou and shiru, "think-and-know". The ramu suffix, added to the shuushikei stem, expresses conjecture: probably we know well that man's life is but a dream...

hito wo yume to: "thinking of man/person/self as a dream" - is a reference to the Chinese philospher Zhuang Zhi, who had a dream of being a butterfly; then woke up and was not sure if he is a man who dreamt to be a butterly, or he is a butterfly and now dreaming to be a man.
 
sumi means "dwelling", suteshi is "abandoned". The modern verb suteru, "to throw away", comes from this old adjective. The shi ending indicates renyoukei, which is often used to express continuation: "(the house) is abandoned, and..."

sono is an old word for "garden", nite expresses similarity, just like in modern Japanese.

Source:http://www.classical-japanese.net

28.10.09

The Stolen Child

-William Butler Yeats





WHERE dips the rocky highland
Of Sleuth Wood in the lake,
There lies a leafy island
Where flapping herons wake
The drowsy water rats;
There we've hid our faery vats,
Full of berrys
And of reddest stolen cherries.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.


Where the wave of moonlight glosses
The dim gray sands with light,
Far off by furthest Rosses
We foot it all the night,
Weaving olden dances
Mingling hands and mingling glances
Till the moon has taken flight;
To and fro we leap
And chase the frothy bubbles,
While the world is full of troubles
And anxious in its sleep.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.


Where the wandering water gushes
From the hills above Glen-Car,
In pools among the rushes
That scarce could bathe a star,
We seek for slumbering trout
And whispering in their ears
Give them unquiet dreams;
Leaning softly out
From ferns that drop their tears
Over the young streams.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.


Away with us he's going,
The solemn-eyed:
He'll hear no more the lowing
Of the calves on the warm hillside
Or the kettle on the hob
Sing peace into his breast,
Or see the brown mice bob
Round and round the oatmeal chest.
For he comes, the human child,
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than he can understand.

24.10.09

Because She Would Ask Me Why I Loved Her


by Christopher Brennan (1870-1932)




If questioning would make us wise

No eyes would ever gaze in eyes;

If all our tale were told in speech

No mouths would wander each to each.



Were spirits free from mortal mesh

And love not bound in hearts of flesh

No aching breasts would yearn to meet

And find their ecstasy complete.



For who is there that lives and knows

The secret powers by which he grows?

Were knowledge all, what were our need

To thrill and faint and sweetly bleed?



Then seek not, sweet, the "If" and "Why"

I love you now until I die.

For I must love because I live

And life in me is what you give.



22.10.09

Tear shaped Ocean

L
OV
E,L
UST,
LOSS,
LOST,L
IFE,LAB
OR,LABRY
INTH,LACER
ATE,LACUNA,
LAMENT,LAUGH
,LEAVE,LEMON-SW
EET,LEMON-BITTER,
LILY-OF-THE-VALLEY,
LEPRECHAUN-GOLD,LIB
ERATION,LIGHT,LAMP,
LEVITATE,LIMITLESS,
LIMERICK,LUMINOU
S,LONELY,LOVEL
Y,LOFTY,LO
NGING




21.10.09

Antarctica




The poem 'Falling Jewels' is about Antarctica.
It is a tribute to its exquisite, fragile, extreme yet life giving beauty.
The moon will mourn if it melts.

15.10.09

Falling Jewels

....the moon mourns the melting mountains of Antarctica...

I've looked at this world of
diamonds and blue solitaires
glistening icicles made of prayer beads
in an arc of iridescent waves.
I'VE SMILED.

Prayer beads have turned and turned,
I’ve risen and set.
Bathing in my silverness, I’ve seen
these jewels melt
and freeze among encrusted pearls.
I’VE GLISTENED.


Diamonds waver - crack
Solitaires drip – drip, drip
pearls come loose – float away
iridescent waves swirl!
I WEEP.

Crystal beads far below
turn slower, slowly
the thread holding them loosens,
crystal and ice scatter - fall
into crevices of unoffered prayers.
I MOURN.

6.10.09

If Only Love Was Real...

The little red star.


A little red star tore out of the sky one day. It fell into the silver river of moonbeams. The silver moonbeam river carried the little red star over hills and plains, across mountains and rivers, above oceans and lakes. Then it entered the enchanted woods where fairies lived- tiny little fairies, with tiny little wings and tinier crowns to decorate their pretty heads.
The fairies were frolicking and bathing in the silver river that came from the moon. And along with the moonbeams came the little red star and “Splash!” it fell among the fairies. The sudden splash of moonbeams scared the fairies as they hurried out of the silver river. The tiny little fairies with tiny little wings and tinier crowns to decorate their pretty heads looked fearfully at the place where the little red star had fallen. Then the tiniest fairy crawled toward the river on two little palms two little knees with her two little wings folded neatly behind. She dipped one little hand into the silver waves and pulled out the little red star. As she held the little red star, it glowed with all its might. It glowed like there’s never going to be darkness again. It glowed with the innocence of a child’s radiant smile. And as the fairy held it, she glowed. She glowed like a jewel encrusted in the silver moonbeam lit forest. Then she asked, “Who are you?” the little red star replied, “A Dream. I was born out of his love for her and that is why I came.”

The tiny little fairy clutched the little red star in her tiny little fist and flew off with her tiny little wings. That night she came to me and put the little red star into my sleeping eyes. The next day you said, “I love you. Will you marry me?”

4.10.09

Heights of absent mindedness!

My sister had just left for college when I thought I'll call her and check whether she got an auto or a bus. Twice my call rang out and I got a little worried. Distractedly, I dialled her number a third time and when she answered, worriedly, I asked, "I think you have left your cellphone home, honey!". [Early mornings, I tell you, tut tut].

30.9.09

Waterfall


There were the Western Ghats, bursting throught the bellies of which were leaves, branches and roots; of every concievable shade of green, though now with a lazy stroke  of dusk rendering them a sort of hopelessly beautiful, tragic quality, with the promise that the night was about to come... or maybe hopefully beautiful haunted quality of the promise of the morning that will eventually chase away the night.

There was some mist hanging across them- like the veil of something that needs protection (not everyone will find it easy to believe that something as tough as mountains need protection in the form of a gauzy lacework of clouds and mists,though). And right across the heart of the mountains hung this infinitely fragile threadwork of diamonds- molten diamonds (if anyone has ever heard of melting diamonds), trickling like beads of prayer. This was the most beautiful present the monsoons decorated the Ghats with. Yes, it was the most beautiful waterfall.

Why, when one sees a watefall (water fall) across rocks, one feels joy, longing, beauty, hope and sadness all at once?

a sheet
of drizzles across my misted window

a trickle
of the waterfalls that flow

a sound
of the word  unsaid

a beam
of sunlight on my bed

a beginning
at the beginning of time

a blessing
of your hands in mine

a moment
of realization of our dreams

a sigh
that surpasses all our screams

a you
who could make my life

a me
who could be your wife

a love
that like silences and words will grow

a life
that through ethers, spaces and time will flow

27.9.09

Our Traditions

Our lives are connected to the immutable life force that is physical and spiritual, tangible and invisible – an inner force of nature that stretches beyond the mortal coil of living into infinite celestial space. I believe that the present state of chaos and restlessness in the world within and without has its roots in our relationship to the ancestors. Vedic tradition, like many other native cultures, informs us that the ancestors play a significant role in our daily lives. They have a vital connection with the world of the living since their subtle energy intimately presents itself to guide, inspire and safeguard our progress and well-being on earth.
There are certain concepts that are part and parcel of the teachings of our culture, which is essentially an all-embracing approach to life. One of these key concepts is that the world is made of consciousness. In Physics, they speak of potential and kinetic energy. If the potential energy isn’t present, let’s say for a pendulum at the top of its swing, there won’t be any kinetic energy of its downward swing. Even at the time when rocks were formed and the planets began to take shape, consciousness had to exist as a potential. If it had not been there, lots of things wouldn’t be around and I wouldn’t write and you wouldn’t read. There had to be a potential for it from the beginning of time for the universe to produce life, consciousness, and the reality of my writing and you reading.
With too much emphasis on technology, we are losing our appreciation of intuitive consciousness. Wouldn’t we have something substantial to gain if we paused for a while to raise our heads from our heavily laden desks to appreciate the subtle promise of spring in the air or the sound of a flowing river? It would tell us the importance of existing, living and make us realize what we could have been and what we really are without and with consciousness.

24.9.09

Movie review: The Wizard of Oz

This is a fairy tale from the MGM studio, well known for its very famous ‘Tom & Jerry’ series. They produced ‘The Wizard of Oz’ way back in 1951.
The story is about a little girl called Dorothy who lives in Kansas with her family and her pup called Toto. Toto lands up in trouble for going after rich people’s cats. A rich and cruel lady comes to take him away from Dorothy, leaving her crying bitterly. But Toto manages to run away, back to her. As children always manage trouble over things they are sentimentalists about, Dorothy decides to run away with Toto. That’s where adventure begins as a twister hits the neighborhood and her house and plucks her house off the earth. She finds herself flying all across the sky. When her home finally hits ground, she finds herself in a strange land and she concludes that she’s reached the land across the rainbow.
The land was inhabited by little people called munchkins. She becomes quite the heroine there because where her house falls in Munchkinland, it hits and squashes the life out of the wicked witch who had troubled little munchkins for a long time. But another wicked witch, the dead witch’s sister wants to avenge her sister’s death. In order to return to her home and save herself from the wicked witch, she sets out to find the most remarkable and powerful and great wizard of Oz. She makes friends on her way, a scare-crow who wants a brain, a tin-man who wants a heart and a cowardly lion who wants courage. How they find the wizard and what they get after finding the wizard forms the substantial part of the motion picture and keeps the interest of the audience glued. They eventually find the Wizard of Oz after a great ordeal and he manages to satisfy all of them, except Dorothy. But a good witch comes to her rescue. Her ‘Ruby Slippers’ take her home
Finally when Dorothy reaches home, she finds that she is in bed with fever and probably it was all a dream.
The commendable part of the theme is the way teachings have been offered to the audience. It’s like some literature by Socrates, and as important, but wrapped in the cover of an Archie comics paperback. They’ve presented morals inside innocent pink humor, through the dialogue and dialogue delivery of the characters. Only, the Archie paperback cover has been more aesthetically done.
The most important thing for young adults to learn is that there is no place like home, which Dorothy realizes after running off. And other things told to us through the scare-crow, the tin-man and the lion point that we are what we think we are. There are no limits to what we can be only if we remove the limits we have decided to impose on ourselves. The shock that viewers get when they find out that the great wizard of Oz was not so great after all is very well handled and tells us that looks can be deceptive and we ought to be able to form opinions ourselves without being affected by rumors and reputations. The noteworthy thing is that even though conventionally a failure, this wizard manages to give to each of them what they want the most, that too from inside themselves.
The end is the celebration of two things, one, the occasion that Dorothy gets back to home and the second that her friends get everything they always badly wanted and strongly believed that they did not and could not have. Both point towards just one thing, the celebration of our ‘will’. Where there is a will, there is a way.
They picture deserves credit for honest adaptation of the original story, very melodious dialogues, musical rhymes and mind-blowing performance of the actress playing Dorothy. They movie is half colored. The part showing Munchkinland and Oz is in colors, though rest of the movie is black & white. The special effects have been much ahead of the time the picture was made. Humor too, though almost five decades old, it has universal appeal and manages to tickle audience of every age.
All in all, the movie, of the genre ‘fantasy’ will never cease to appeal to the psychologies and the deepest desires of young adults.

23.9.09

Atlantis

In mid-Atlantic there is an island that only the souls of the heroes can enter- without dying. The Greek philosophy holds that these are the Isles of the Blessed. It is on the floor of the ocean and glinting and glowing are towers of Atlantis. The ocean floor is too deep down, but the lights too strong, visible to every ship that would pass, the Isles keep shimmering under the waves.
Another legend holds that the greatest explorer of all times found the Fountain of Eternal Youth. He had worked very hard to reach it. He worked harder to get it down from the mountains, where he had found it, to his fellow-men. He tried and tried. Only he never came back, because he learnt that it could not be brought down.
If we look closely, we will find that the two legends are inseparable – the Fountain of Youth and Atlantis. And yes, they cannot be shared, presented or received in charity, because they are in the depths and the heights of our own selves, our bodies, minds and souls.

[From ‘Atlas Shrugged’ and ‘The Fountainhead’ by Ayn Rand]

22.9.09

Burning bridges

There’s something I’ve got to learn,
I can’t cross bridges that I burn.
The alien waves lapping at feet
In foreign colors like fields of wheat.
Walking alone I must know now
There are natural answers to ‘what’, ‘when’ and ‘how’…
The world is grey and at times green,
Doesn’t help if I refuse to see how things have been.
Community they say…that’s where people belong…
How could I know? An outcast all along….
Square pegs and round holes…or round holes and square pegs?
Rat-a-tat… I’m still as anomalous as cocktail dregs!
There’re some things I just can’t learn…
I still try to cross the bridges that I burn.

There are people they call normal around;
Can you tell me where is the ‘normal’ species found?
I’d get my ticket, get my visa and passport stamped,
I’ll jump on that first jet that comes to the ramp.
Then I’ll come back with a ‘brand’..
I’d be called a return from ‘Normal-land’!
The world feels crazy and upside-down,
Like maids cleaning with their hair and the king sitting on his crown.
Like seas coming to the rivers and not the reverse,
And Gods blessing with bloodshed and curses.
Like the pyramid that stands on its tip,
The pharaohs and mummies, their knuckles white in their grip.

Why are the bridges burnt, you ask?
Because I like to stick to my own task.
Love, appreciation and respect are ‘normal’ to me…
Though jealousy, hatred and killing are all that I can see.
How should I understand the language of the gun?
Why should I accept the color of blood as the color of power?
Were you mis-pronouncing it, or I caught it right,
A war was called so your traders could benefit from selling fright?
Fright wrapped on a bullet or stuffed in a torpedo…
Powdered in cocaine? Ohh what credo!
I’ll burn all the bridges till I can…
So that I can’t cross them nor can another man.
Yes there is something you’ve got to learn…
No one can cross the bridges that I burn.

31.8.09

Art on Fabric: A collection in Madhubani


Madhubani art is a form of traditional painting particular to Madhubani, Bihar. History traces it back to the times of Ramayana where the wedding of Lord Rama and Sita was depicted through Madhubani paintings. Madhubani paintings were originally done on walls but through evolution they are now found on canvas, cloth and even paper.

Features of madhubani art include the use of organic colours. Generally a Madhubani painting includes images of hindu deities, humans, plants, animals, sun and the moon. It might be an illustration of hopes and dreams or rituals and social events.

Although not a dying art, Madhubani art has not recieved its due from the creative souls of the current times. But its beauty, intricacies and dignity make it unique. Be in on wall or on paper or on fabric, a Madhubani painting, tastefully done is fully capable of breathing life into it's medium and background. Generally done with nibs and following a style where spaces and motifs are neither filled in with shading of colours nor left blank, it looks like a delicate web of lines, shapes and colours. Actually, inside the outline,a particular motif is filled with straight or criss crossed tiny lines drawn with infinite patience of the artist.

My mother, a gifted lady with elegant taste and matchless grace has always been fascinated with the Madhubani form of art. Her talent for impeccable and classy clothes and turnout have been appreciated and envied simultaneously. She has put together a collection of ancient Madhubani on modern chiffons and crepes apart from the more traditional forms of silk like raw silk. She designed some kurtas and saris embellished with Madhubani paintings. The choice of colours, fabric and designs is unique and the effect astoundingly graceful and feminine.

The different types of fabrics are: cotton, linen, kota, raw silk, tassar silk, tassar pashmina silk, chiffon, crepe and georgette.

Though this collection was ensembled to satisfy her creativity and for personal use, I want to express my appreciation and pride for her talent. She put this together almost effortlessly and in very limited time and money.

23.8.09

Aeon Is Five Days Long

Glassy leaves and glassy snow,
Glass doors and a glass window.
A magical verse, a melodious hymn,
A delicious deluge of feeling upto the brim.
Mysterious, wild, the long gone musical tone,
Helpless, overpowered, all alone….
Fondly fixed eyes, as they stare,
Fragments of heart and soul, all bare.
The thread that floated; silvery blue
Crossed the air, then the glass, through and through,
Each end tied each one; like the descent of Apollo,
They both seemed to glimmer and glow.
Day one, it promised rosy dawn
Innocent, like the glossy eyes of a fawn.
Day two like morning was fresh and bright
Gold and pink, it was all delight!
Day three, the sun at zenith at noon
Rust coloured autumn and the ancient rune.
Day four, aurora, twilight and dusk
Roses, violets all smelt of musk.
Day five showed lustre of a shooting star
More tender than the end of romance or a weeping flower.
But existence ends once night is gone
Because at the end of those five days, it was the end of an Aeon.

When Death Failed...

As the sun glittered
Through the cracks on the glass
And the sound of falling sand
Hit the ears from the hour-glass.

The moments silky to the fingers;
Slid on and on under touch.
Till it seemed nothing was left;
But indeed, what lay was much.

His body made of lines and planes,
His eyes sparkling like diamonds cut.
His heart all light, yet heavy to self,
As he calculated an ‘if’ and a ‘but’.

His life was a hazy maze
Till he made up his mind.
She looked at him with half-closed eyes,
He kept gazing as if blind.

Her body made of pulp and dust,
All her being poured through her eyes.
He held her close; like letting her go;
As his mind shouted all the ‘whys?’

He’d loved her, he’d lived her.
He gazed on and on to capture.
He cried as he listened and counted
All the breath that came from her.

She belonged there, right on his chest.
He had the key to all she had.
Why fate chose that she should leave;
And he should remain eternally sad?

The music remained long after that last sigh,
And kept coming back to him like echo.
Her lifeless body clung to him,
He stroked her hair as if she were much more.

His heart expanded, his veins exploded,
A curve touched his lips; he looked insane!
The smile held all he felt
As he said, “Nothing should remain.”

“Never is a long time”, he said,
“Forever sounds good.”
The Earth has all mortals,
So he chose ‘Forever’ with all that he could.

Night lay on its elbows to watch-
She battered and he poisoned lay…
Destiny loved their love enough,
Love had had the final say.

As the stars glittered
Through the cracks on the glass…
And the sound of falling sand
Hit the ears from the hour-glass…

The moments silky to the fingers;
Slid on and on under touch.
Till it seemed nothing was left;
But indeed, what lay was much.

22.8.09

Of Beauty and Fantasies

Of beauty and fantasies,
Of dances and melodies,
Of gardens and candlelit ways under the starlight,
Of portraits and sculptors of the lady with her knight,
I dreamt.
Of kisses and eyelashes,
Of rainwater splashes,
Of commitments and promises for decades and centuries,
Of love and oneness in lives across eternities,
I dreamt.
Dreams are made of moonbeams, they say,
Realities are cut out of earth and clay.
Beauty, fantasies, dances, melodies,
Gardens, starlight, portraits and stories,
Dreams and dreams; are dreams of dreams.
Dreams glitter, they shine and glow,
Realities are real and mundane, we know.
But dreams can break into a thousand moonbeams,
Glittering shards of glass; of beauty and pain they’re reams,
Realities are real; dreams clash with realities.
So, I had this dream,
All beauty and moonbeam!
Sculptors and portraits of romance,
Of music and stories and songs and dance!
So hard it hit against reality,
Through the glass and tears, I struggled with my sanity.
Unborn dreams and unspoken realities
Are as real as actualities and as surreal as fantasies.
Dreams are broken in every passing moment,
But again, they will be born and take you in their torrent.
Hard it is to stick to reality,
Harder still to give up a fantasy!
Days and nights have passed in pain
And in struggling hard to keep me sane.
I have those dreams, tucked in the back of my drawers,
It’s all broken glass, tears, dried, withering flowers.
A bruised and bleeding heart beats in me
Because of that one fleeting romantic moment when I believed I could let my dreams take on my reality.

BACK TO SCHOOL DAYS

Blue n yellow, the bus, honking along
Blue-capped driver, with a brand new song.
Shoe-laces n pigtails; they don’t look bizarre,
Faces with tears or smile, lovely as flower.

Rhymes n drawing n mathematics,
Planting n sculpting with all new tactics.
Picnics in woods with the colored ball,
Cakes n pizzas n chocolates for all.

Choco-chipped eves n lemonade splashed days;
Running n bowling n swimming our ways.
Fleeing the scene of ‘mothers with milk’;
Playing in the sun with heads of silk.

Parks n beaches n trees were pleasure,
Funny, we seem to have forgotten our treasure!
Sand-castles and pixies and the blue-tooth fairy,
Have gone somewhere n left our lives so dreary.

Growing up was fun, grown-ups are not,
The one next to you is liar or a cheating blot.
Silver n golden scintillating were our ways.
If clocks changed ways, I’d be back to school days.

19.8.09

The Caretaker

Shekharan, the peon, was furiously working across the keys of his typewriter.
“O God! This damned thing is again skipping spaces..” His irritated voice seemed exhausted. Fatigue was clearly showing in his tired, slightly blood-shot eyes. He carefully pulled out the sheet from the typewriter with his gnarled hands, as if it were something very precious.

It was a dark room with soot-eaten walls. His possessions were few but immaculately kept and neat. Only the table where he was working looked grimy – most probably because of the residue dripping from the oil lamp that was burning, emitting a pale yellow light that encircled the man and his object. Rest of the room lay in blackness.

The sight was strange. A thin, balding man, with hollowed cheeks and thick glasses was poring over thick journals that spoke in technical jargons of wind velocity, atmospheric pressures and ocean currents, the kind of journals one would expect in the hands of a bespectacled, well-fed professor with an intellectual high forehead teaching in a class-room or preparing papers in some research and development department as a scientist.
Shekharan, in his crushed peon’s uniform hardly looked the kind. And yet, he was, right there and studying, alright, forgetting his dinner that was simmering in the corner and dripping softly onto the floor, feeding a queue of ants.

Dr. R. Rajan was fumbling across his table. His study looked tornado-struck. He anxiously pulled the whole stack of files toward himself and began going through them feverishly, overturning his table-lamp and causing a paperweight to fall and shatter into a thousand pieces of glasses, sparkling like tear drops on the floor. Then he sank. His head in his hands, exasperated! What was he going to do? His papers were gone. He had to submit them the day after.

Dr. Rajan worked as a scientist in the Indian Institute of Oceanography. He had joined there six months ago. He had researched on ocean currents and giant waves. His current work was based on Tsunami- the under-water earthquake. He quickly called his guide Dr. Edward Thomas to ask if he had a back-up file of the missing papers on his computer, for his own computer refused to budge.
“Dr. Thomas, have I in any case, left the Tsunami papers in your study this evening while discussing it over tea?”
Sensing terseness in his Rajan’s voice, Thomas’s eyes opened wide in spite of the late hour. He snapped on his bed-lamp.
“No Rajan, but, what’s the matter?”
“Dr. Thomas, the papers are missing!” There wasn’t time, or the occasion to feel guilty of being irresponsible.
“O no! Are you sure? Might they be in your cabinet or in your office?”
Thomas wasn’t sleepy anymore. His eyes were alert and his brain was working furiously.
“No Dr. Thomas. They were with me. I left my study at half past eight to have dinner. When I came back, the window was open and the room bore signs of strange presence. Nothing valuable is gone, but, but my papers are missing… they’re stolen!”
He said the final sentence heavily and could speak no more.

Stolen… stolen! It reminded Dr. Thomas of the other two incidents. Last year Dr. Sahay’s paper on Tsunami and a year before Dr. Khanna’s papers on Tsunami were mysteriously stolen. As he was the editor-in-chief of the bi-annual journal of the institute, both had, just like Rajan, panicked and called him up. Dr. Sahay’s paper had been complete and in his office, from where they were stolen. They were anonymously mailed to Dr. Thomas after a week. Something similar had happened in Dr. Khanna’s case.
Edward Thomas’s brain was full and buzzing at the mysterious lost-and-found games.
“Hello.. Dr. Thomas, are you there?” Rajan’s voice seemed broken.
“Yes.. Yes, I’m sorry... I kind of drifted away.” Replied Thomas distractedly.
“I wanted to ask, sir, if the Tsunami file is stored on your computer.” It was Rajan’s last ray of hope. If the data, observations, calculations and results were available, he would stay up for the next few nights and rewrite the whole thesis.
“I think so. Relax, Rajan. I’ll write the file onto a CD for you. See whatever can be done. I’ll give you more time of course. In case you need help you can come over. We’ll see whatever best can be done.” Thomas’s words were like fingers soothing the creases on Rajans’ forehead. He felt gratitude of immense measure.
“Thank you, sir. Good night.”

Forgetting the phone hanging down the table, Thomas threw back his covers, pulled on his dressing-gown and lit a cigarette. He paced his balcony ignoring the chilly droughts lashing him like a whip.

“Both the times the papers were gone. But both the times they were anonymously returned, rather mailed directly to me without stamps or address. If it were a conspiracy, same papers should have been published elsewhere under spurious names. But nothing of the sort happened. Dr. Sahay had even been nominated for the international award for his outstanding findings. No one tried to steal his credit.”

Deep in thought, poking his mind for the umpteenth time, going over the last two incidents, Thomas lighted his fourth cigarette. In the dead of the night the man was invisible; so were the rings of smoke rising lightly and dissolving into the cold air like the different possibilities the creature creating them formed and discarded in his mind. He was only a dot of fire moving to and fro, like that one object in his mind- to solve the Tsunami paper riddle.

His chin held between his thumb and index finger, propping against the railing of his balcony, Thomas saw the seam of the sky tear open revealing a pink-gold on the horizon. Dawn broke and cheerful orange streamers fluttering from the fireball of the January sun plunged the world into a new day. And like the dawn, suddenly Thomas remembered something.
17th January2010, the year before - the day the journal had come out, Dr. Sahay had come to Thomas’s office clutching a copy. He had opened his article ‘Tsunami 2004’ and placed it in front of Dr. Thomas. Puzzled, Dr. Thomas had looked up from the pages to find Dr. Sahay’s eyes bewildered. Amused, yes, but bewildered.
“Did you notice something in my papers when they came to you?” asked Dr. Sahay softly.
“Like what, Dr. Sahay?”
“There are a few changes in my original work. There are new data, new calculations and new findings. The last part is not mine. But indeed, it is some great mind that has worked it out.” Sahay had spoken slowly, emphasizing every word.
“Strange, very strange. Are you sure?” Now Thomas had appeared as bewildered.
“Absolutely. I can show you my rewritten thesis. I’ve never had this new concept at all. It is not mine.” Sahay spoke clearly and truthfully.
“Ok Dr. Sahay, but keep this to yourself. We’ll not tell others about this. It will create lot of gossip and might bring the wrong kind of publicity to the Institute and our journal. Only when someone claims that the work is his, we’ll need to see what can be done. But do not talk about this with anyone.”
Dr. Sahay had retired that July and no claims had been made yet. Khanna had also told him of some changes in his work but hadn’t spoken of new findings. Perhaps he was enjoying all the compliments that came his way.

By the time the sun had risen fully, Thomas made up his mind. “Let the plan work. Please God, just let the plan work”, he prayed.
He drove to the post-office earlier than the working hours. He waited for some time before Raja, the postman who delivered letters at the Institute came whistling.
“Good morning, Raja” greeted Thomas merrily.
“Morning, sahib.” Raja was disconcerted for a moment when the otherwise grave Dr. Thomas cheerfully wished him.
“I need your help, Raja, a small favour.”
“Yes sir. Whatever I can do.” Raja replied, clumsily climbing off his bicycle.
“My mailbox in the office is broken. All the letters fall off the broken bottom and I sometimes lose valuable mail. Please deliver all my mail in Dr. R. Rajan’s mailbox for the next few days.”
Raja took the fifty rupee note from Dr. Thomas’s fingers and grinning widely repeated, “Dr. R. Rajan. Sure, sir. Your job will be done.”
“Thanks, Raja. I’ll inform you when my mailbox is mended”, shouted Thomas as he drove away.

Thomas then went to the electronics shop and bought a sophisticated, ultra-sensitive alarm. Now, the action was slightly strange, but the happiness in his red, puffed-up eyes looked stranger and he looked a little mad, perhaps out of relief and expectation together.
He was late for his class that day and he seemed distracted. His tongue slipped a dozen times and he banged into walls and cabinets all day. There were no prizes for guessing that he was preoccupied.
He waited for something to happen all day and for the next few days. All his work seemed futile when Rajan came into his office a week after the burglary to say that he had nearly completed the rewriting and that his papers would be ready in the next couple of days. He kept the first half of the papers titled ‘Tsunami 2004: A New Insight’ on Thomas’s desk and left.

Thomas inwardly prayed for something to happen. He decided that he would not go home that night, as he had done for the past few nights.

Shekharan, the peon, was checking all the cabins and locking them after switching off the lights. He seemed distracted and preoccupied as he hurried homeward after handing over the keys to the night watchman.

Thomas drifted into sleep around midnight, still praying for something to happen. He was woken by an alarm screeching in the building and the racket created by the slamming shut of the exits.
“Yes! Got him!” he shouted in glee as he ran toward his mailbox. The mailboxes were on the wall under the stairs, right at the entrance.
The watchman also reached the source of noise and finding Thomas there gave a full military salute. But Thomas’s eyes were fixed on Shekharan who was standing with a thick white envelope half stuffed into Thomas’s mailbox. He stood stupefied with wide fearful eyes.
Thomas inwardly thanked the device and alarm system for working effectively as he snatched the envelope from the peon’s hands, tore it open and stared at “Tsunami 2004: A New Insight” in disbelief before switching off the alarm.
The peon, still as a statue did not understand what had made the alarm go off as he had pushed the papers into the mailbox.
“Shekharan, is it you? Why? Was it you who stole Dr. Sahay’s papers and Dr. Khanna’s? But no, it can’t be. They were edited in an outstanding way.”
Shekharan, now fully aware of the situation finally found his voice.
“Yes sir, it was me.” He said quietly.
“Why, Shekharan? What for?” Thomas managed to squeak.
“Sir I’ve collected lot of information on Tsunami, especially the one that hit eleven nations in 2004. I wanted to share the latest information and findings with everyone so that the best preventive measures could be designed and people don’t suffer anymore like the lakhs that did in December 2004. And who would take an undergraduate peon seriously? So I decided to publish my findings under eminent names.
“Why, that’s commendable, certainly. But Shekharan.. I mean… well, you’re right but…” Thomas could not talk coherently. He was undoubtedly impressed, but all the same, this was unprecedented!
“Sir, let me tell you everything. Before coming and settling here, I lived in Nagapattinam. I lived with my wife and my 18 year old son Ramesh. He was a champion athlete. That morning on December 26,2004 he went to the beach to run. My house was a few metres away from the sea and a little high up. I saw my son proudly as he jogged toward the water. I saw him run and that was the last thing he ever did. Before I could comprehend, a huge wall of water came and crashed all over the place. My son was being pulled into the sea. I stood stupefied, could not move. Tried shouting, could not speak. Frozen, with my mouth hanging open, I saw my son’s head bobbing for a second over water before I ran. But the crowd running in opposite direction knocked me over. I was trampled over by frightened people running for their lives. “Where’s my son?” was the last thought before I fainted. When I revived, I was on my bed and my wife sat crying.
“Ramesh”, I shouted and ran out of my house. What I saw made my stomach turn. There was nothing but the sea everywhere. No houses, no people. Our house was saved because of being at some height. Dead bodies littered the beach. I ran from corpse to corpse. Ramesh was not there. Two days later, rescue-workers brought back his bloated body. My wife saw his body and died of shock. I lost both of them in that one instant.” Shekharan’s voice shook and faded.
He spoke in a stronger voice, “It is then that I decided that I will not mourn the loss of my family, rather work so that no one else suffers like me. I came here and worked for the Institute. I studied day and night. Whenever someone researched on Tsunami, I wanted to give all that I had.”
Thomas was speechless. He held the old man’s shoulders. Silent tears on Shekharan’s creased face made, for the first time look 55. The peon turned and walked away.
Thomas watched the exhausted steps of the old man who had indeed been the ‘caretaker’ throughout. He hadn’t realized perhaps that his head was bowed and his joined hands paid tribute to the man walking quietly away.

18.8.09

Childhood

My childhood days were filled with the love and light that every child rightfully deserves from the time she even begins to be a child.
Angels come to earth in the form of children, with their white, glistening faith, sparkling smiles and glittering eyes, complete with wings and halos (if we are capable of going beyond the mundane and seeing).
‘Childhood’, the word stirs in me a few feelings, brings to me some moments, a few stories, though mostly incomplete and infinite poetry, thoroughly forgotten.
Poetry? Yes, some R.L.Stevension, some Robert Frost, an Alfred Tennyson and thousands and thousands of sounds, a hundred half forgotten words, some colors that the words would feel, some feelings that the verses would color; some fairies, some Gods, some magic and my mother.

I’m no more a child in appearance, though in some ways, other than on the surface, I will still claim to be one. I’ve grown up, into an adult, well into the ways of the world. Still sometimes I find myself face to face with all the forgotten Stevension and Robert Frost they taught me at school. Such profound beauty and completeness they’d given to my life that I still seek them, in books and websites, in the voids of my heads, the spaces of my heart and the closets of my memory.
There are some verses, half forgotten wrapped in cloudy dreams, some hidden by a pale shadow, of perhaps some calamity that had come with it, like a reprimand or a standing-out handed by my teacher and there are some more, glittering, as if through a pool of clear water, like gems at the bottom, reflecting all the sunlight. They hold in them mysteries, good ones, capable of giving hope and joy. They tell stories, some real stories (if, by some faith, we can actually believe that stories can be real), some made in that child’s head of mine! Some smell of naughty children who picked on me, some have the scent of a honey-coloured day, smelling of warm, sticky, bright pink candy and a garden picnic among flowers and butterflies and still others have the smell of old books in the library, of deep incense of a small and beautiful chapel and some smell of hot tears of punishments in PT classes.

A few of the poems which I managed to finally find J

R.L.STEVENSION.
Foreign Lands

Up into the cherry tree
Who should climb but little me?
I held the trunk with both my hands
And looked abroad in foreign lands.
I saw the next door garden lie,
Adorned with flowers, before my eye,
And many pleasant places more
That I had never seen before.
I saw the dimpling river pass
And be the sky's blue looking-glass;
The dusty roads go up and down
With people tramping in to town.
If I could find a higher tree
Farther and farther I should see,
To where the grown-up river slips
Into the sea among the ships,
To where the roads on either hand
Lead onward into fairy land,
Where all the children dine at five,
And all the playthings come alive.

My Shadow
I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.
The funniest thing about him is the way he likes to grow--
Not at all like proper children, which is always very slow;
For he sometimes shoots up taller like an india-rubber ball,
And he sometimes goes so little that there's none of him at all.
He hasn't got a notion of how children ought to play,
And can only make a fool of me in every sort of way.
He stays so close behind me, he's a coward you can see;
I'd think shame to stick to nursie as that shadow sticks to me!
One morning, very early, before the sun was up,
I rose and found the shining dew on every buttercup;
But my lazy little shadow, like an arrant sleepy-head,
Had stayed at home behind me and was fast asleep in bed.

The Swing (* this poem I studied in Std II or III! It was a favorite! Mom even got me a real swing in our garden)
How do you like to go up in a swing,
Up in the air so blue?
Oh, I do think it the pleasantest thing
Ever a child can do!
Up in the air and over the wall,
Till I can see so wide, River and trees and cattle and all
Over the countryside-- Till I look down on the garden green,
Down on the roof so brown-- Up in the air I go flying again,
Up in the air and down!