31.8.09

Art on Fabric: A collection in Madhubani


Madhubani art is a form of traditional painting particular to Madhubani, Bihar. History traces it back to the times of Ramayana where the wedding of Lord Rama and Sita was depicted through Madhubani paintings. Madhubani paintings were originally done on walls but through evolution they are now found on canvas, cloth and even paper.

Features of madhubani art include the use of organic colours. Generally a Madhubani painting includes images of hindu deities, humans, plants, animals, sun and the moon. It might be an illustration of hopes and dreams or rituals and social events.

Although not a dying art, Madhubani art has not recieved its due from the creative souls of the current times. But its beauty, intricacies and dignity make it unique. Be in on wall or on paper or on fabric, a Madhubani painting, tastefully done is fully capable of breathing life into it's medium and background. Generally done with nibs and following a style where spaces and motifs are neither filled in with shading of colours nor left blank, it looks like a delicate web of lines, shapes and colours. Actually, inside the outline,a particular motif is filled with straight or criss crossed tiny lines drawn with infinite patience of the artist.

My mother, a gifted lady with elegant taste and matchless grace has always been fascinated with the Madhubani form of art. Her talent for impeccable and classy clothes and turnout have been appreciated and envied simultaneously. She has put together a collection of ancient Madhubani on modern chiffons and crepes apart from the more traditional forms of silk like raw silk. She designed some kurtas and saris embellished with Madhubani paintings. The choice of colours, fabric and designs is unique and the effect astoundingly graceful and feminine.

The different types of fabrics are: cotton, linen, kota, raw silk, tassar silk, tassar pashmina silk, chiffon, crepe and georgette.

Though this collection was ensembled to satisfy her creativity and for personal use, I want to express my appreciation and pride for her talent. She put this together almost effortlessly and in very limited time and money.

23.8.09

Aeon Is Five Days Long

Glassy leaves and glassy snow,
Glass doors and a glass window.
A magical verse, a melodious hymn,
A delicious deluge of feeling upto the brim.
Mysterious, wild, the long gone musical tone,
Helpless, overpowered, all alone….
Fondly fixed eyes, as they stare,
Fragments of heart and soul, all bare.
The thread that floated; silvery blue
Crossed the air, then the glass, through and through,
Each end tied each one; like the descent of Apollo,
They both seemed to glimmer and glow.
Day one, it promised rosy dawn
Innocent, like the glossy eyes of a fawn.
Day two like morning was fresh and bright
Gold and pink, it was all delight!
Day three, the sun at zenith at noon
Rust coloured autumn and the ancient rune.
Day four, aurora, twilight and dusk
Roses, violets all smelt of musk.
Day five showed lustre of a shooting star
More tender than the end of romance or a weeping flower.
But existence ends once night is gone
Because at the end of those five days, it was the end of an Aeon.

When Death Failed...

As the sun glittered
Through the cracks on the glass
And the sound of falling sand
Hit the ears from the hour-glass.

The moments silky to the fingers;
Slid on and on under touch.
Till it seemed nothing was left;
But indeed, what lay was much.

His body made of lines and planes,
His eyes sparkling like diamonds cut.
His heart all light, yet heavy to self,
As he calculated an ‘if’ and a ‘but’.

His life was a hazy maze
Till he made up his mind.
She looked at him with half-closed eyes,
He kept gazing as if blind.

Her body made of pulp and dust,
All her being poured through her eyes.
He held her close; like letting her go;
As his mind shouted all the ‘whys?’

He’d loved her, he’d lived her.
He gazed on and on to capture.
He cried as he listened and counted
All the breath that came from her.

She belonged there, right on his chest.
He had the key to all she had.
Why fate chose that she should leave;
And he should remain eternally sad?

The music remained long after that last sigh,
And kept coming back to him like echo.
Her lifeless body clung to him,
He stroked her hair as if she were much more.

His heart expanded, his veins exploded,
A curve touched his lips; he looked insane!
The smile held all he felt
As he said, “Nothing should remain.”

“Never is a long time”, he said,
“Forever sounds good.”
The Earth has all mortals,
So he chose ‘Forever’ with all that he could.

Night lay on its elbows to watch-
She battered and he poisoned lay…
Destiny loved their love enough,
Love had had the final say.

As the stars glittered
Through the cracks on the glass…
And the sound of falling sand
Hit the ears from the hour-glass…

The moments silky to the fingers;
Slid on and on under touch.
Till it seemed nothing was left;
But indeed, what lay was much.

22.8.09

Of Beauty and Fantasies

Of beauty and fantasies,
Of dances and melodies,
Of gardens and candlelit ways under the starlight,
Of portraits and sculptors of the lady with her knight,
I dreamt.
Of kisses and eyelashes,
Of rainwater splashes,
Of commitments and promises for decades and centuries,
Of love and oneness in lives across eternities,
I dreamt.
Dreams are made of moonbeams, they say,
Realities are cut out of earth and clay.
Beauty, fantasies, dances, melodies,
Gardens, starlight, portraits and stories,
Dreams and dreams; are dreams of dreams.
Dreams glitter, they shine and glow,
Realities are real and mundane, we know.
But dreams can break into a thousand moonbeams,
Glittering shards of glass; of beauty and pain they’re reams,
Realities are real; dreams clash with realities.
So, I had this dream,
All beauty and moonbeam!
Sculptors and portraits of romance,
Of music and stories and songs and dance!
So hard it hit against reality,
Through the glass and tears, I struggled with my sanity.
Unborn dreams and unspoken realities
Are as real as actualities and as surreal as fantasies.
Dreams are broken in every passing moment,
But again, they will be born and take you in their torrent.
Hard it is to stick to reality,
Harder still to give up a fantasy!
Days and nights have passed in pain
And in struggling hard to keep me sane.
I have those dreams, tucked in the back of my drawers,
It’s all broken glass, tears, dried, withering flowers.
A bruised and bleeding heart beats in me
Because of that one fleeting romantic moment when I believed I could let my dreams take on my reality.

BACK TO SCHOOL DAYS

Blue n yellow, the bus, honking along
Blue-capped driver, with a brand new song.
Shoe-laces n pigtails; they don’t look bizarre,
Faces with tears or smile, lovely as flower.

Rhymes n drawing n mathematics,
Planting n sculpting with all new tactics.
Picnics in woods with the colored ball,
Cakes n pizzas n chocolates for all.

Choco-chipped eves n lemonade splashed days;
Running n bowling n swimming our ways.
Fleeing the scene of ‘mothers with milk’;
Playing in the sun with heads of silk.

Parks n beaches n trees were pleasure,
Funny, we seem to have forgotten our treasure!
Sand-castles and pixies and the blue-tooth fairy,
Have gone somewhere n left our lives so dreary.

Growing up was fun, grown-ups are not,
The one next to you is liar or a cheating blot.
Silver n golden scintillating were our ways.
If clocks changed ways, I’d be back to school days.

19.8.09

The Caretaker

Shekharan, the peon, was furiously working across the keys of his typewriter.
“O God! This damned thing is again skipping spaces..” His irritated voice seemed exhausted. Fatigue was clearly showing in his tired, slightly blood-shot eyes. He carefully pulled out the sheet from the typewriter with his gnarled hands, as if it were something very precious.

It was a dark room with soot-eaten walls. His possessions were few but immaculately kept and neat. Only the table where he was working looked grimy – most probably because of the residue dripping from the oil lamp that was burning, emitting a pale yellow light that encircled the man and his object. Rest of the room lay in blackness.

The sight was strange. A thin, balding man, with hollowed cheeks and thick glasses was poring over thick journals that spoke in technical jargons of wind velocity, atmospheric pressures and ocean currents, the kind of journals one would expect in the hands of a bespectacled, well-fed professor with an intellectual high forehead teaching in a class-room or preparing papers in some research and development department as a scientist.
Shekharan, in his crushed peon’s uniform hardly looked the kind. And yet, he was, right there and studying, alright, forgetting his dinner that was simmering in the corner and dripping softly onto the floor, feeding a queue of ants.

Dr. R. Rajan was fumbling across his table. His study looked tornado-struck. He anxiously pulled the whole stack of files toward himself and began going through them feverishly, overturning his table-lamp and causing a paperweight to fall and shatter into a thousand pieces of glasses, sparkling like tear drops on the floor. Then he sank. His head in his hands, exasperated! What was he going to do? His papers were gone. He had to submit them the day after.

Dr. Rajan worked as a scientist in the Indian Institute of Oceanography. He had joined there six months ago. He had researched on ocean currents and giant waves. His current work was based on Tsunami- the under-water earthquake. He quickly called his guide Dr. Edward Thomas to ask if he had a back-up file of the missing papers on his computer, for his own computer refused to budge.
“Dr. Thomas, have I in any case, left the Tsunami papers in your study this evening while discussing it over tea?”
Sensing terseness in his Rajan’s voice, Thomas’s eyes opened wide in spite of the late hour. He snapped on his bed-lamp.
“No Rajan, but, what’s the matter?”
“Dr. Thomas, the papers are missing!” There wasn’t time, or the occasion to feel guilty of being irresponsible.
“O no! Are you sure? Might they be in your cabinet or in your office?”
Thomas wasn’t sleepy anymore. His eyes were alert and his brain was working furiously.
“No Dr. Thomas. They were with me. I left my study at half past eight to have dinner. When I came back, the window was open and the room bore signs of strange presence. Nothing valuable is gone, but, but my papers are missing… they’re stolen!”
He said the final sentence heavily and could speak no more.

Stolen… stolen! It reminded Dr. Thomas of the other two incidents. Last year Dr. Sahay’s paper on Tsunami and a year before Dr. Khanna’s papers on Tsunami were mysteriously stolen. As he was the editor-in-chief of the bi-annual journal of the institute, both had, just like Rajan, panicked and called him up. Dr. Sahay’s paper had been complete and in his office, from where they were stolen. They were anonymously mailed to Dr. Thomas after a week. Something similar had happened in Dr. Khanna’s case.
Edward Thomas’s brain was full and buzzing at the mysterious lost-and-found games.
“Hello.. Dr. Thomas, are you there?” Rajan’s voice seemed broken.
“Yes.. Yes, I’m sorry... I kind of drifted away.” Replied Thomas distractedly.
“I wanted to ask, sir, if the Tsunami file is stored on your computer.” It was Rajan’s last ray of hope. If the data, observations, calculations and results were available, he would stay up for the next few nights and rewrite the whole thesis.
“I think so. Relax, Rajan. I’ll write the file onto a CD for you. See whatever can be done. I’ll give you more time of course. In case you need help you can come over. We’ll see whatever best can be done.” Thomas’s words were like fingers soothing the creases on Rajans’ forehead. He felt gratitude of immense measure.
“Thank you, sir. Good night.”

Forgetting the phone hanging down the table, Thomas threw back his covers, pulled on his dressing-gown and lit a cigarette. He paced his balcony ignoring the chilly droughts lashing him like a whip.

“Both the times the papers were gone. But both the times they were anonymously returned, rather mailed directly to me without stamps or address. If it were a conspiracy, same papers should have been published elsewhere under spurious names. But nothing of the sort happened. Dr. Sahay had even been nominated for the international award for his outstanding findings. No one tried to steal his credit.”

Deep in thought, poking his mind for the umpteenth time, going over the last two incidents, Thomas lighted his fourth cigarette. In the dead of the night the man was invisible; so were the rings of smoke rising lightly and dissolving into the cold air like the different possibilities the creature creating them formed and discarded in his mind. He was only a dot of fire moving to and fro, like that one object in his mind- to solve the Tsunami paper riddle.

His chin held between his thumb and index finger, propping against the railing of his balcony, Thomas saw the seam of the sky tear open revealing a pink-gold on the horizon. Dawn broke and cheerful orange streamers fluttering from the fireball of the January sun plunged the world into a new day. And like the dawn, suddenly Thomas remembered something.
17th January2010, the year before - the day the journal had come out, Dr. Sahay had come to Thomas’s office clutching a copy. He had opened his article ‘Tsunami 2004’ and placed it in front of Dr. Thomas. Puzzled, Dr. Thomas had looked up from the pages to find Dr. Sahay’s eyes bewildered. Amused, yes, but bewildered.
“Did you notice something in my papers when they came to you?” asked Dr. Sahay softly.
“Like what, Dr. Sahay?”
“There are a few changes in my original work. There are new data, new calculations and new findings. The last part is not mine. But indeed, it is some great mind that has worked it out.” Sahay had spoken slowly, emphasizing every word.
“Strange, very strange. Are you sure?” Now Thomas had appeared as bewildered.
“Absolutely. I can show you my rewritten thesis. I’ve never had this new concept at all. It is not mine.” Sahay spoke clearly and truthfully.
“Ok Dr. Sahay, but keep this to yourself. We’ll not tell others about this. It will create lot of gossip and might bring the wrong kind of publicity to the Institute and our journal. Only when someone claims that the work is his, we’ll need to see what can be done. But do not talk about this with anyone.”
Dr. Sahay had retired that July and no claims had been made yet. Khanna had also told him of some changes in his work but hadn’t spoken of new findings. Perhaps he was enjoying all the compliments that came his way.

By the time the sun had risen fully, Thomas made up his mind. “Let the plan work. Please God, just let the plan work”, he prayed.
He drove to the post-office earlier than the working hours. He waited for some time before Raja, the postman who delivered letters at the Institute came whistling.
“Good morning, Raja” greeted Thomas merrily.
“Morning, sahib.” Raja was disconcerted for a moment when the otherwise grave Dr. Thomas cheerfully wished him.
“I need your help, Raja, a small favour.”
“Yes sir. Whatever I can do.” Raja replied, clumsily climbing off his bicycle.
“My mailbox in the office is broken. All the letters fall off the broken bottom and I sometimes lose valuable mail. Please deliver all my mail in Dr. R. Rajan’s mailbox for the next few days.”
Raja took the fifty rupee note from Dr. Thomas’s fingers and grinning widely repeated, “Dr. R. Rajan. Sure, sir. Your job will be done.”
“Thanks, Raja. I’ll inform you when my mailbox is mended”, shouted Thomas as he drove away.

Thomas then went to the electronics shop and bought a sophisticated, ultra-sensitive alarm. Now, the action was slightly strange, but the happiness in his red, puffed-up eyes looked stranger and he looked a little mad, perhaps out of relief and expectation together.
He was late for his class that day and he seemed distracted. His tongue slipped a dozen times and he banged into walls and cabinets all day. There were no prizes for guessing that he was preoccupied.
He waited for something to happen all day and for the next few days. All his work seemed futile when Rajan came into his office a week after the burglary to say that he had nearly completed the rewriting and that his papers would be ready in the next couple of days. He kept the first half of the papers titled ‘Tsunami 2004: A New Insight’ on Thomas’s desk and left.

Thomas inwardly prayed for something to happen. He decided that he would not go home that night, as he had done for the past few nights.

Shekharan, the peon, was checking all the cabins and locking them after switching off the lights. He seemed distracted and preoccupied as he hurried homeward after handing over the keys to the night watchman.

Thomas drifted into sleep around midnight, still praying for something to happen. He was woken by an alarm screeching in the building and the racket created by the slamming shut of the exits.
“Yes! Got him!” he shouted in glee as he ran toward his mailbox. The mailboxes were on the wall under the stairs, right at the entrance.
The watchman also reached the source of noise and finding Thomas there gave a full military salute. But Thomas’s eyes were fixed on Shekharan who was standing with a thick white envelope half stuffed into Thomas’s mailbox. He stood stupefied with wide fearful eyes.
Thomas inwardly thanked the device and alarm system for working effectively as he snatched the envelope from the peon’s hands, tore it open and stared at “Tsunami 2004: A New Insight” in disbelief before switching off the alarm.
The peon, still as a statue did not understand what had made the alarm go off as he had pushed the papers into the mailbox.
“Shekharan, is it you? Why? Was it you who stole Dr. Sahay’s papers and Dr. Khanna’s? But no, it can’t be. They were edited in an outstanding way.”
Shekharan, now fully aware of the situation finally found his voice.
“Yes sir, it was me.” He said quietly.
“Why, Shekharan? What for?” Thomas managed to squeak.
“Sir I’ve collected lot of information on Tsunami, especially the one that hit eleven nations in 2004. I wanted to share the latest information and findings with everyone so that the best preventive measures could be designed and people don’t suffer anymore like the lakhs that did in December 2004. And who would take an undergraduate peon seriously? So I decided to publish my findings under eminent names.
“Why, that’s commendable, certainly. But Shekharan.. I mean… well, you’re right but…” Thomas could not talk coherently. He was undoubtedly impressed, but all the same, this was unprecedented!
“Sir, let me tell you everything. Before coming and settling here, I lived in Nagapattinam. I lived with my wife and my 18 year old son Ramesh. He was a champion athlete. That morning on December 26,2004 he went to the beach to run. My house was a few metres away from the sea and a little high up. I saw my son proudly as he jogged toward the water. I saw him run and that was the last thing he ever did. Before I could comprehend, a huge wall of water came and crashed all over the place. My son was being pulled into the sea. I stood stupefied, could not move. Tried shouting, could not speak. Frozen, with my mouth hanging open, I saw my son’s head bobbing for a second over water before I ran. But the crowd running in opposite direction knocked me over. I was trampled over by frightened people running for their lives. “Where’s my son?” was the last thought before I fainted. When I revived, I was on my bed and my wife sat crying.
“Ramesh”, I shouted and ran out of my house. What I saw made my stomach turn. There was nothing but the sea everywhere. No houses, no people. Our house was saved because of being at some height. Dead bodies littered the beach. I ran from corpse to corpse. Ramesh was not there. Two days later, rescue-workers brought back his bloated body. My wife saw his body and died of shock. I lost both of them in that one instant.” Shekharan’s voice shook and faded.
He spoke in a stronger voice, “It is then that I decided that I will not mourn the loss of my family, rather work so that no one else suffers like me. I came here and worked for the Institute. I studied day and night. Whenever someone researched on Tsunami, I wanted to give all that I had.”
Thomas was speechless. He held the old man’s shoulders. Silent tears on Shekharan’s creased face made, for the first time look 55. The peon turned and walked away.
Thomas watched the exhausted steps of the old man who had indeed been the ‘caretaker’ throughout. He hadn’t realized perhaps that his head was bowed and his joined hands paid tribute to the man walking quietly away.

18.8.09

Childhood

My childhood days were filled with the love and light that every child rightfully deserves from the time she even begins to be a child.
Angels come to earth in the form of children, with their white, glistening faith, sparkling smiles and glittering eyes, complete with wings and halos (if we are capable of going beyond the mundane and seeing).
‘Childhood’, the word stirs in me a few feelings, brings to me some moments, a few stories, though mostly incomplete and infinite poetry, thoroughly forgotten.
Poetry? Yes, some R.L.Stevension, some Robert Frost, an Alfred Tennyson and thousands and thousands of sounds, a hundred half forgotten words, some colors that the words would feel, some feelings that the verses would color; some fairies, some Gods, some magic and my mother.

I’m no more a child in appearance, though in some ways, other than on the surface, I will still claim to be one. I’ve grown up, into an adult, well into the ways of the world. Still sometimes I find myself face to face with all the forgotten Stevension and Robert Frost they taught me at school. Such profound beauty and completeness they’d given to my life that I still seek them, in books and websites, in the voids of my heads, the spaces of my heart and the closets of my memory.
There are some verses, half forgotten wrapped in cloudy dreams, some hidden by a pale shadow, of perhaps some calamity that had come with it, like a reprimand or a standing-out handed by my teacher and there are some more, glittering, as if through a pool of clear water, like gems at the bottom, reflecting all the sunlight. They hold in them mysteries, good ones, capable of giving hope and joy. They tell stories, some real stories (if, by some faith, we can actually believe that stories can be real), some made in that child’s head of mine! Some smell of naughty children who picked on me, some have the scent of a honey-coloured day, smelling of warm, sticky, bright pink candy and a garden picnic among flowers and butterflies and still others have the smell of old books in the library, of deep incense of a small and beautiful chapel and some smell of hot tears of punishments in PT classes.

A few of the poems which I managed to finally find J

R.L.STEVENSION.
Foreign Lands

Up into the cherry tree
Who should climb but little me?
I held the trunk with both my hands
And looked abroad in foreign lands.
I saw the next door garden lie,
Adorned with flowers, before my eye,
And many pleasant places more
That I had never seen before.
I saw the dimpling river pass
And be the sky's blue looking-glass;
The dusty roads go up and down
With people tramping in to town.
If I could find a higher tree
Farther and farther I should see,
To where the grown-up river slips
Into the sea among the ships,
To where the roads on either hand
Lead onward into fairy land,
Where all the children dine at five,
And all the playthings come alive.

My Shadow
I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.
The funniest thing about him is the way he likes to grow--
Not at all like proper children, which is always very slow;
For he sometimes shoots up taller like an india-rubber ball,
And he sometimes goes so little that there's none of him at all.
He hasn't got a notion of how children ought to play,
And can only make a fool of me in every sort of way.
He stays so close behind me, he's a coward you can see;
I'd think shame to stick to nursie as that shadow sticks to me!
One morning, very early, before the sun was up,
I rose and found the shining dew on every buttercup;
But my lazy little shadow, like an arrant sleepy-head,
Had stayed at home behind me and was fast asleep in bed.

The Swing (* this poem I studied in Std II or III! It was a favorite! Mom even got me a real swing in our garden)
How do you like to go up in a swing,
Up in the air so blue?
Oh, I do think it the pleasantest thing
Ever a child can do!
Up in the air and over the wall,
Till I can see so wide, River and trees and cattle and all
Over the countryside-- Till I look down on the garden green,
Down on the roof so brown-- Up in the air I go flying again,
Up in the air and down!